Friday, May 13, 2005

After My First Deposition

My deposition went very well, tyvm. I succeeded in getting the deponent to authenticate a video clip of a presentation he gave that I found on the Internet. You'd think the other side would produce such things. I decided to ask the partner, DS, if she'd like me to second chair at her depo of the chairman.

G-man: I don't know when you are taking [the chairman], but since he is the proverbial dead end to many of the questions asked in previous depositions, I thought you might like some help. I'm willing to go along if you'd like and offer any technical assistance you might need. Please let me know.

DS: Only if you can come up with another video clip--perhaps of Congressional committee testimony?!?!

G-man: I'm sure something like that can be arranged.

DS: And I want the equivalent of the negatives!

DA: Just don't let my secretary make your traveling arrangements!

DS: Oh my...perhaps I shouldn't even ask....

DA: Let's just say that my secretary doesn't like to use the Travel Service and booked the flight and hotel herself, so we flew out and into Newark and the hotel was so bad that we checked out within an hour and had the Travel Service find us new accommodations.

Let's also just say that we left the first “hotel” in such a hurry that G-man forgot his scivies and had to go back later, and on the way to the new hotel he got shat on by a bird! Good fun all around ; )

DS: Sounds like the screenplay for a Chevy Chase movie!

G-man: Yep, that's pretty much the story of my life.

DS: Maybe Owen Wilson can play you in the movie.

G-man: Yeah, like from Dumb & Dumber. Now that's just too funny.

DS: I was thinking of Meet the Parents and Meet the Fockers, but.....

G-man: My favorite part was when I waived to DA from the p-way when I boarded the plane, while she remained corralled behind the fence with the rest of the cattle.

DA: yeah, that was my favorite part too. G-man was sucking up to another Navy guy so he could get on the plane faster. Don't trust G-man, he'll leave ya in the dirt if he can.

G-man: Well, my conversation with a fellow shipmate worked, didn't it? I hadn't seen that guy in 25 years, since OCS, which used to be in Newport, Rhode Island. While you were moo-ing behind the fence, I was taking advantage of the opportunity to board early, afforded to almost everyone else besides ourselves, and that was the only way I could think of to get my trusty, wheeled suitcase (which served you well this trip) into the overhead compartment, so I wouldn't complain too loudly (although the look on your face was priceless when I was waiving goodbye :)

DA: It is true, G-man was the baggage handler for the entire trip. I guess that was worth early boarding.

G-man: And, to cap it all off, the car service did not arrive until after a full half-hour had passed. They of course sent my driver to the wrong terminal. He blamed it on the office, but your driver was there waiting for you, so once again, I guess you win.