Thursday, June 09, 2005

Things I Heard on the Train

Two old ladies were sitting behind me

OL#2, to the conductor: How much is it to Babylon? If you don't have a ticket, do you have to pay a penalty?

Conductor: No, seniors don't have to pay a penalty.

OL#1: I guess the LIRR figures we're too feeble to figure out how to use the ticket machines.

After the conductor left, a lady walked through the Long Beach train, asking for $14. I was tempted to tell her I had the money for her, but I wanted to ask her what color her kids hair was, or other assorted factual questions, which she should know right away. I'd seen her several times before, so I knew she was a grifter (and not a very good one), and I felt like it would be worth $14 to listen to her twist in the wind.

OL#1: The last time I gave somebody some money, they guy turned out to be a beggar.

OL#2: Yeah, that happened to me last time I was in Vegas, playing the
slot machines.

So, I guess OL#1 is right -- why does the LIRR forego the ticket purchase penalty for seniors?